The Collapse Of The Structures

It has been a while since I felt to write to express what is within and today's energy of new beginning compels me to go on an exploration.

Last night I went to listen to a respected astrologer, the presentation tuned out to be more a sermon than anything else and only served to re awake my frustration at this person's lack of understanding of the energies at work. The statement was made that we are divine beings having a human experience, yet as I remember my anointing, I know I Am a human being having a God experience.

There was talk about 2012 and the collapsing of the structures, and much stress was placed upon the effects on humankind and the letting go of those that no longer serve. And again I shake my head at the seeming blindness of those who call themselves spiritual people, blind to their beliefs placing emphasis on separation, and I question why it is that those who have obsolete teachings are the ones people flock to! Why are people so resistant to let go of their dis-empowerment? One can claim that uncommon ideas are rejected simply because they are that, but, in Truth, ultimately it all comes down to the beautiful words written by Maryanne Williamson: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure, it our light, not our darkness that most frightens us."

There are spiritual beliefs, structures, that are becoming redundant in the New Earth energy. Beliefs shall no longer be as we shall be coming from a deep INNER KNOWING. The so called Age of Aquarius with its key words "I KNOW" is almost upon us, and I have come wired for this, functioning in this energy for a long time already, and lately this profound remembrance has been activated to a new level that has me finding it increasingly difficult to listen to those who still preach the old ways, and I wonder if this frustration is simply a sign that it is time for me to come out of the shadow and share my knowing?

I am a messenger human and like all, the message I carry is in my DNA and mine IS active. As stated in my very first blog, I have no need for titles, I hold no diplomas and I have never had the need to study under a guru or teacher, spiritual books hold no appeal for me and it has been many years since I last needed confirmation of what I knew was already within, and a few months ago I uncovered the reason, like an amnesiac who suddenly regains his or her memory, I suddenly saw all the pieces of my puzzle take form and I realized that there never was a moment when I did not know my godhood, that I HAVE ALWAYS KNOWN MY DIVINITY. 

Through my artwork and its information I have been a messenger for 11 years now, and as I read again the many pages of information I have written with each SoulSelf portrait, I find very little of it obsolete, if anything I am amazed at all the knowing that I have accessed way ahead of its time. In total honesty, often these days I find myself tired of repeating the same message over and over again, in different terms, but nevertheless the same. Yet much previously hidden information is also being revealed as I look from the perspective of the All Seeing Eye above the pyramid, and the concepts, oh so familiar to me, are quite revolutionary to those who have looked and still see the pyramid as what must be achieved and look to others who have letters after their names for knowledge. The Knowledge I access is within and is not of the learned kind but just IS....Oh yes, a true collapse of structures, structures that have been built on the shaky foundation of false beliefs,  the UN KNOWING.

Dance Partners Of Another Kind

A rainy and cool day again, it is windy and it reminds me that the winds of change are upon us. Today is an 8, and I wonder what form the Infinite and Abundance are about to take for me.

I can feel another level of letting go and there is a sadness involved with it, what is it about, I do not know yet. Is it about a releasing of old friends again? Non physical Ones who have walked by my side for a long long time it seems, it feels, dear trusted friends of old who have been by my side not "guiding" as much as energetically supporting my energy, giving me of their Heart, while I reclaimed the fullness of mine. Ones who have danced with me as I walk this earth, dance partners of another kind, the invisible sort but oh so powerful and supportive. Ones whose vibration matched mine in so many ways that it was but impossible to distinguish a separation between us and now they are "saying goodbye" in a sense, yet it is not a goodbye as in truth they are but aspects of myself that I had not reconnected with yet, appearing to stand separate, outside of myself, but mirrors of my own Self. So now it is time for me to accept the Gift of my own Heart fully reclaimed and allow them to move on, becoming part of the Whole again, therefore becoming part of my Self again.

Sadness And Joy, The Beauty And Richness Of Feeling All

If one could only see the immensity of the beauty and richness in the feelings experienced on this physical plane of existence, judgement of self would no longer be. The colors evoked are beyond our comprehension yet are recognized by the Heart. Again, it is the energy at work behind the feelings, or hidden knowledge, and let me tell you I see no ugly color, only new notes, deeper hues of a music yet unheard on this plane.

Lately it has struck me deeply that the more one opens oneself to remembering that we are LOVE, the more profound ones feelings become, the sadness as well as the joy. I dare say feel all that you can feel without judging your emotions. And once more, I venture into a territory that very few have gone before it seems, if anything the reverse has been true, the motto has been eliminate the Ego, control it, eliminate judgment by denying the feeling response, yet I am saying NO, do feel, all that you can feel, and judge this NOT , this is the way to True Love. One cannot love if one is not open to all and LOVE IS ALL ENCOMPASSING

Hidden Knowledge

A 13 day with the energy of resurrection and transformation behind it and a grey day welcome me. It is raining and I feel my garden's grateful acceptance of this gift of life from the sky. I can almost hear and feel the ground breathing in deeply and stretching as it accommodates for new growth of roots and it is a day of increased activity underground as all the creatures it harbours breathe in this life force from the heavens.

I wonder why the meanderings of my Heart/Mind connection take me in this direction this morning? I do not know yet, its reason still hidden from me as I begin this chapter and now its name has just been given to me.

What is knowledge but the result of an experience? And "hidden knowledge" is the knowledge that lies beyond our mind's comprehension yet is available to our senses as we allow ourselves to open to all of them. Hidden knowledge lies in the music of lines, in the spaces in between words, it is in the rhythm of the exhale and inhale inherent to the thought processes and the words used to express them. It is not what we see that is as important as it is what remains unseen. And if it remains hidden from our eyes, does it mean it does not exist, of course not, we cannot see the teeming life underfoot yet, we know it is there, still we lay claim to this day in and day out. And again I am reminded that it is not the words that matter so much as the energy behind them.

Suddenly I look at my old kitchen counter top with a renewed vision and no, my eyes cannot see it for something other than it is yet, but I can feel a life behind it, a breath of sorts, an expansion and a contraction occuring simultaneously that keep it in its current form and I am able to tune into the life of this so called inanimate object, the arrangement of its molecules and since I am the One who brought it into manifestation  for my current experience, so I have the ability to rearrange its molecules to create a whole new counter top, and obviously the whole house as well as the house is as old as its counter top, and I know this desire shall be manifested in the appropriate timing of the Whole as usual.

I Feel The Love Of Mother Earth's Elements

And so I begin today, another 9 day in this 9 month, and with the realization that the power of all previous numbers are within this 9, I expect new revelations, I expect a magical day.

The Sun greeted me this morning and sitting by the window, its warming rays lulled me into a space of stillness and I felt its presence in a way that is almost inexplicable, I mean I felt its PRESENCE, its Love for me, and in this moment of utter beingness I also suddenly felt the Love of the Water Element and it spoke to me in waves after waves of pure blissful flow, an endless River of Love, of Peace gently lapping at my feet, at my body and around my heart. Has anyone ever felt this? Amazing is not a word befitting of the expereince, Sacred? Yes, but so much more than this as well.The Water element is so powerful that NO THING can touch it, and just like Mother Earth Herself, it reflects only the perception of our own imperfection. And as I am writing this, I feel its love and presence still.

I reached for my Lemurian crystal and held its sparkling beauty in my hand, I noticed its smoky yellow had taken on a mellow golden hue, I saw and felt the gold ray of illumination in it and it reflected it to me or is it that I simply reflected the gold ray to it? And I marveled at the wonders of this day's promise to me as tears fell, but my expression of Infinite Joy.

Well, can I really be surprised by this turn of events? Last night I just completed a SoulSelf portrait of One of the Elemental Kingdom and she embodies all the Elements of Mother Earth and as usual, I FEEL THE DEEP KNOWING that this picture is an allegory of my Self as well. However, lately the experience of this Knowing has become that much more profound, that again the words cannot truly do it justice as I struggle to place a descriptive frame around it. Well, this morning's experience pretty much explains how much deeper it has become.

Love Forgotten, Love Remembered

On this 9 day in a 9 month, a time of completion is at hand, and it is an incredible time of revealing. Of revealing who we are behind the facade presented to the world, and what we are not. No more hiding behind false beliefs or ideologies, for the time has come for those to come to the Light of our True Heart and remember at long last that WE ARE LOVE

The front that had been so carefully prepared is collapsing under our very eyes. No more pretense, no more denying the truth that has been staring at us in the face for so long and that we have been afraid to admit. We are perfect as we are. Is it humankind's propensity to look for flaws in all things that has most denying their Divinity still? When I hear the words "Soul growth" and "tests," I cringe at the implied imperfection of our state, how can one be in need of any growth or tests if one already is perfect?

I just read an excerpt from a spiritual book and it always fascinates me when people make claims to know Love when they feel the need to meditate in order to access this space.

Of course we all know Love and it cannot be anyother way since WE ARE LOVE, we simply forgot. However to reawaken this memory, the body and the Ego must be included, they cannot be kept separate through such tools as meditation.

I have said this many times and I shall repeat it again, meditation is a tool that shall become redundant in the New Earth as it requires to be in a space of separation from body and Ego in order to connect to Spirit. Spirit is not separate from us, we are Spirit materialized. Our body is Divine matter, the Ego is a Divine creation with a Divine purpose, therefore it is Divine. To say that the Ego is the part of us that likes us to remain small is inaccurate, it is the part of us that was originally created for survival of the species, it differenciates so we can recognize what is appropriate or not for our survival, as we changed so it evolved in the direction dictated by the experiences, eventually losing track of its original purpose. Love the Ego and it shall stop fighting you, give it a new job and it shall joyfully and gratefully relay to your side.

Through a recent event that most would see as extremely unfortunate, I have just been made aware of how much Love IS part of my life, of the extent of this Love in me, and I can find no end to it. A large and quite expensive crystal was "taken" from me, and when I searched my heart for a feeling of anger or loss, I found no space that judged or laid blame on this person, instead I found a great stillness and vastness, and in its midst, a Love free of fanfare, a Love defying the conventional as it just IS and I now recognize the sweetness of the Gift disguised as a loss, and it's beauty is infinitely breathtaking and my forever grateful heart reaches out to this man, whoever he is, wherever he is, for the Gift he gave me, may it be returned to him a hundred fold.

And so this day's epiphany sings its melody in my heart as I realize that in seeing other's lives through the eyes of Love, I have looked at MY LIFE and I am now able to see and experience the beauty of my own perfection. And Joy sings a quiet yet profoundly moving song within my Being, IT JUST IS, it just is, it just is...

Prologue: The Seed Of A Beginning Lies In Its Completion

In the seeming Chaos of any Beginning lies the Order of its Evolution and the secret of its Completion.

And I introduce myself and my story on the same day I have just written the last chapter and as I reread the many pages I marvel at the order in which revelations come, not my or your idea of order, but the Universe's.

This is a linear compilation of non linear experiences, an apparent dichotomy, for language is such a linear tool, however the chapters can be read in any order you wish without affecting the final outcome, this is a QUANTUM STORY, the story is designed to be a catalyst for an expansion, how it shall be revealed for the individual is for YOU to recognize.

I ask that you judge not one chapter worthy of your attention more than another or to have no correlation to the next or the previous one, all are important links to the final revelation. It is not the order in which you feel to read them but that you read them all that matters, for in some the Mind shall be prominent, in others the Heart, and in others still both shall be equally present.

My story is ANYONE'S STORY, perhaps not in the way YOU have experienced it but the energy behind its origination is the same. It is a story stemming from a long ago Heart break and the steps to reclaim one's Heart's fullness. It is a story of loss through which a gift greater than the loss was gained.

And so with this chapter I begin, as the first part of my journey ends on this day 4/28/2011, a 9 day, a good day to bring it all into a whole.